[ The Memories ]
Sunday, October 30, 2005
The month of doing self-discovery tests
More personality tests... Lolx!
Ah well, its nice to document and look back on how much i have changed over time.
I guess its because we are never really secure, and will always wan to know more about our Selves, or how we appear in other people's eyes. Hence the never-ending quest for self-discovery and the flourish of all sorts of personality quizzes.
Anyway, here are more tests results. At this point of time anyway.
Global 5 Type Descriptions
SCOAI
| Big Five Test Results |
Extroversion (66%) moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity.
Accommodation (58%) moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly kind natured, trusting, and helpful at the expense of your own individual development (martyr complex).
Orderliness (60%) moderately high which suggests you are, at times, overly organized, neat, structured and restrained at the expense too often of flexibility, variety, spontaneity, and fun.
Emotional Stability (62%) moderately high which suggests you are relaxed, calm, secure, and optimistic.
Inquisitiveness (58%) moderately high which suggests you are intellectual, curious, imaginative but possibly not very practical.
|
SCOAI
(2.8% of women; 4.0% of men)
happy, level emotions, not easily discouraged, optimistic, fearless, self confident, non-hostile, trusting, rarely sad, social, content, positive, knows where life is going, socially skilled, not quiet around strangers, acts comfortably with others, takes on responsibilities, likes public speaking, not prone to worrying, not apprehensive about new encounters, flexible, adapts easily to new situations, not afraid to draw attention to self, likes to lead, not bored while working, likes others, hard to annoy, calm in crisis, does not second guess self, not embarrassed easily, high energy level, easy to understand, thinks before acting, strong sense or purpose, likes crowds, interested in science, not prone to jealousy, comfortable in unfamiliar situations, fearless, not skeptical, true to self in all circumstances, highly motivated to succeed, decisive, easy to get to know, narcissistic, driven by reason, physically fit, passionate about bettering the world's condition, finishes most things they start, not easily confused, willing to explain things twice, thinks they are extraordinaryTake Free Big Five Personality Testpersonality tests by similarminds.com
Advanced Big 45 Personality Test Results | Gregariousness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Sociability | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Assertiveness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Poise | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 62% | | Leadership | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Provocativeness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 62% | | Self-Disclosure | |||||||||||||||||| | 54% | | Talkativeness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Group Attachment | ||||||||||||||| | 50% | | Extroversion | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Understanding | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Warmth | |||||||||||||||||||||||| | 74% | | Morality | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Pleasantness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Empathy | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Cooperation | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 62% | | Sympathy | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Tenderness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Nurturance | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Accommodation | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 68% | | Conscientiousness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Efficiency | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 62% | | Dutifulness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Purposefulness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Organization | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Cautiousness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 62% | | Rationality | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Perfectionism | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Planning | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Orderliness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 67% | | Stability | |||||||||||||||||| | 58% | | Happiness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 62% | | Calmness | ||||||||||||||| | 46% | | Moderation | ||||||||||||||| | 50% | | Toughness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Impulse Control | ||||||||||||||| | 46% | | Imperturbability | |||||||||||| | 34% | | Cool-headedness | ||||||||| | 30% | | Tranquility | ||||||||||||||| | 50% | | Emotional Stability | ||||||||||||||| | 49% | | Intellect | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Ingenuity | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Reflection | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Competence | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Quickness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Introspection | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Creativity | |||||||||||||||||| | 54% | | Imagination | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Depth | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Openmindedness | ||||||||||||||||||||| | 66% | |
Take Free Advanced Big 45 Personality Testpersonality tests by similarminds.com | Factor | | low score | high score |
| Gregariousness | 66% | quiet, reclusive | engaging, socially bold |
| Sociability | 70% | withdrawn, hidden | warm, open, inviting |
| Assertiveness | 66% | timid, gunshy | controlling, aggressive |
| Poise | 62% | uneasy around others | socially comfortable |
| Leadership | 70% | stays in background | prefers to lead |
| Provocativeness | 62% | modest, plays it safe | bold, uninhibited, cocky |
| Self-Disclosure | 54% | private, contained | very open and revealing |
| Talkativeness | 70% | quiet, stealthy, invisible | motor mouth, loud |
| Group Attachment | 50% | loves solitude | prefers to be with others |
| Understanding | 70% | insensitive, schizoid | respectful, sympathetic |
| Warmth | 74% | disinterested in others | supportive, helpful |
| Morality | 70% | break/ignore the rules | play by the rules |
| Pleasantness | 70% | aloof or disagreeable | gets along with others |
| Empathy | 70% | out of tune w/ others | in tune with others |
| Cooperation | 62% | competitive, warlike | agreeable, peaceful |
| Sympathy | 66% | socially inconsiderate | socially conscious |
| Tenderness | 66% | cold hearted, selfish | warm hearted, selfless |
| Nurturance | 70% | self pleasing, me first | people pleasing, me last |
| Conscientiousness | 70% | reckless, unscheduled | careful, planner |
| Efficiency | 62% | unreliable, lazy | finisher, follows through |
| Dutifulness | 70% | leisurely, derelict | strict, rule abiding |
| Purposefulness | 66% | inattentive, undisciplined | prepared, focused |
| Organization | 70% | relaxed, oblivious | detail oriented, anal |
| Cautiousness | 62% | impulsive, spendthrift | restrained, cautious |
| Rationality | 66% | irrational, random | direct, logical |
| Perfectionism | 70% | careless, error prone | detail obsessed |
| Planning | 70% | disorganized, random | scheduled, clean |
| Stability | 58% | easily frustrated | calm, cool, unphased |
| Happiness | 62% | unhappy, dissatisfied | self content, positive |
| Calmness | 46% | touchy, volatile | even tempered, tolerant |
| Moderation | 50% | needs instant gratification | easily delays gratification |
| Toughness | 66% | hypersensitive, moody | thick skinned |
| Impulse Control | 46% | lacks self control | maintains composure |
| Imperturbability | 34% | highly emotional | emotionally contained |
| Cool-headedness | 30% | demanding, controlling | accommodating |
| Tranquility | 50% | emotionally volatile | emotionally neutral |
| Intellect | 70% | instinctive, non-analytical | intellectual, analytical |
| Ingenuity | 66% | lacks new ideas | innovative, novel |
| Reflection | 70% | unreflective, coarse | art and beauty lover |
| Competence | 66% | slow to understand/think | intellectual, brainy |
| Quickness | 66% | intellectually dependent | intellectually independent |
| Introspection | 66% | not self reflective | self searching |
| Creativity | 54% | dull headed | synthesizer, iconoclast |
| Imagination | 66% | practical, realistic | dreamer, unrealistic |
| Depth | 70% | lacks curiosity | mental explorer |
Take Free Advanced Big 45 Personality Testpersonality tests by similarminds.com
+ Ursula r e m e m b e r s again + 6:53 PM
Strike five
I wan to eat the zaru soba at Hisatomo~!!!
I. CRAVE. IT.
My zaru soba.... =~(
Who can i meet to go eat it??!
I wan to meet up with so many people!
But i'm so busy now! or if i'm not, they seem to be (its everyone's except UOL students' exam period)!
Have gone back to working at the law firm part-time.
Yes... their newly found secretary has left cos of family problems.
After barely 3 weeks.
The job is cursed i tell you!!
Not one PERM staff they have found for that position has lasted more than ONE MONTH!
Safe for me; and irony of ironies, i'm only supposed to be the TEMP staff there but i've worked THREE MONTHS. Its really cursed or smth... everyone in my patents dept are jus totally stupefied.
U wan to noe how cursed that job is?
They have changed FIVE assistants in the past 1 and a half year and NOT ONE STAYED FOR MORE THAN A MONTH!! Five! One month! My god.
They were saying maybe its that seat/work-station... feng shui no good or smth.
The next perm staff they hire, they are so gonna move them to the work station beside this one instead. Which frankly, i think wud be in their best interest too, if they wan an uneventful family life/health/work relations/watever other reasons they truthfully left for.
Dun noe how long i'll be temping there till.
Prob onli until next week, when they shd have a full-time temp come in (since i can onli help them so much working part-time) or if they are lucky, find their perm very soon.
But seeing as WL (the bigger of my 2 bosses) will be flying to China for business and wun be back till the week after next, the earliest they can start interviewing new candidates will be at least a while.
Everyone in my IP dept have been happy to see me back (tho my bosses wud prob haf preferred their perm staff stayed perm).
Its nice to be back :) Even temporarily.
+ Ursula r e m e m b e r s again + 4:29 AM
Friday, October 28, 2005
Soiled
I wish i could stop hating you. I wish i could return to the time when i dun think you were unclean. Back in the time when u could do no wrong in my eyes. The whole world may be right, but i'm never wrong about you.
But i dun noe how.
Now i see that i'm wrong.
I wish i had never known anything at all.
Maybe the one who has changed
is me.
+ Ursula r e m e m b e r s again + 11:36 PM
Saturday, October 15, 2005
More about my MBTI
Oh ho... how true some of them are...
//
Portrait of an ESFJ
- Extraverted Sensing Feeling Judging
(Extraverted Feeling with Introverted Sensing)
The Socializer / The Caregiver
As an ESFJ, your primary mode of living is focused externally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit in with your personal value system. Your secondary mode is internal, where you take things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion.
ESFJ types like to put other people at ease. They are talkative, popular, and genuinely convinced that rough times can be overcome if people work together. They put a lot of conscientious energy into making this happen. Natural hosts and hostesses, they pay attention to even the smallest detail to make people feel welcome.
ESFJs are people persons - they love people. They are warmly interested in others. They use their Sensing and Judging characteristics to gather specific, detailed information about others, and turn this information into supportive judgments. They want to like people, and have a special skill at bringing out the best in others. They are extremely good at reading others, and understanding their point of view. The ESFJ's strong desire to be liked and for everything to be pleasant makes them highly supportive of others. People like to be around ESFJs, because the ESFJ has a special gift of invariably making people feel good about themselves.
The ESFJ takes their responsibilities very seriously, and is very dependable. They value security and stability, and have a strong focus on the details of life. They see before others do what needs to be done, and do whatever it takes to make sure that it gets done. They enjoy these types of tasks, and are extremely good at them.
ESFJs are warm and energetic. They need approval from others to feel good about themselves. They are hurt by indifference and don't understand unkindness. They are very giving people, who get a lot of their personal satisfaction from the happiness of others. They want to be appreciated for who they are, and what they give. They're very sensitive to others, and freely give practical care. ESFJs are such caring individuals, that they sometimes have a hard time seeing or accepting a difficult truth about someone they care about.
With Extraverted Feeling dominating their personality, ESFJs are focused on reading other people. They have a strong need to be liked, and to be in control. They are extremely good at reading others, and often change their own manner to be more pleasing to whoever they're with at the moment.
The ESFJ's value system is defined externally. They usually have very well-formed ideas about the way things should be, and are not shy about expressing these opinions. However, they weigh their values and morals against the world around them, rather than against an internal value system. They may have a strong moral code, but it is defined by the community that they live in, rather than by any strongly felt internal values.
ESFJs who have had the benefit of being raised and surrounded by a strong value system that is ethical and centered around genuine goodness will most likely be the kindest, most generous souls who will gladly give you the shirt off of their back without a second thought. For these individuals, the selfless quality of their personality type is genuine and pure. ESFJs who have not had the advantage of developing their own values by weighing them against a good external value system may develop very questionable values. In such cases, the ESFJ most often genuinely believes in the integrity of their skewed value system. They have no internal understanding of values to set them straight. In weighing their values against our society, they find plenty of support for whatever moral transgression they wish to justify. This type of ESFJ is a dangerous person indeed. Extraverted Feeling drives them to control and manipulate, and their lack of Intuition prevents them from seeing the big picture. They're usually quite popular and good with people, and good at manipulating them. Unlike their ENFJ cousin, they don't have Intuition to help them understand the real consequences of their actions. They are driven to manipulate other to achieve their own ends, yet they believe that they are following a solid moral code of conduct.
All ESFJs have a natural tendency to want to control their environment. Their dominant function demands structure and organization, and seeks closure. ESFJs are most comfortable with structured environments. They're not likely to enjoy having to do things which involve abstract, theoretical concepts, or impersonal analysis. They do enjoy creating order and structure, and are very good at tasks which require these kinds of skills. ESFJs should be careful about controling people in their lives who do not wish to be controlled.
ESFJs respect and believe in the laws and rules of authority, and believe that others should do so as well. They're traditional, and prefer to do things in the established way, rather than venturing into unchartered territory. Their need for security drives their ready acceptance and adherence to the policies of the established system. This tendency may cause them to sometimes blindly accept rules without questioning or understanding them.
An ESFJ who has developed in a less than ideal way may be prone to being quite insecure, and focus all of their attention on pleasing others. He or she might also be very controling, or overly sensitive, imagining bad intentions when there weren't any.
ESFJs incorporate many of the traits that are associated with women in our society. However, male ESFJs will usually not appear feminine at all. On the contrary, ESFJs are typically quite conscious about gender roles and will be most comfortable playing a role that suits their gender in our society. Male ESFJs will be quite masculine (albeit sensitive when you get to know them), and female ESFJs will be very feminine.
ESFJs at their best are warm, sympathetic, helpful, cooperative, tactful, down-to-earth, practical, thorough, consistent, organized, enthusiastic, and energetic. They enjoy tradition and security, and will seek stable lives that are rich in contact with friends and family.
+ Ursula r e m e m b e r s again + 3:39 PM
Monday, October 10, 2005
MBTI Type
Jung Explorer Test
Actualized type: ESFJ
(who you are)
| ESFJ - "Seller". Most sociable of all types. Nurturer of harmony. Outstanding host or hostesses. 12.3% of total population. |
Preferred type: ESFJ
(who you prefer to be)
| ESFJ - "Seller". Most sociable of all types. Nurturer of harmony. Outstanding host or hostesses. 12.3% of total population. |
Attraction type:
ESFJ (who you are attracted to)
Enneagram Test Results | Type 1 | Perfectionism | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Type 2 | Helpfulness | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | | Type 3 | Image Awareness | |||||||||||||||| | 70% | | Type 4 | Sensitivity | |||||||||| | 40% | | Type 5 | Detachment | |||||||||||||| | 56% | | Type 6 | Anxiety | |||||||||||||||| | 66% | | Type 7 | Adventurousness | |||||||||||| | 43% | | Type 8 | Aggressiveness | |||||||||| | 40% | | Type 9 | Calmness | |||||||||||||||| | 63% | Your main type is 3 Your variant is social |
Take Free Enneagram Personality Testpersonality tests by similarminds.com
My MBTI type has changed again. ESFJ.
It used to be ISFJ/ISFP.
Haha, the type i am, the type i wan to be and the type i'm attracted to are actually all the same this time. Funny.
Try it out.
+ Ursula r e m e m b e r s again + 2:26 AM
Saturday, October 08, 2005
Art vs. Aestheticized Erotica
Been watching the anime Peace Maker on Central, and in the past two days, discovered how it is getting more and more sexually implicit...
its not jus the spy shagging the enemy to get info thingy - thats quite explicit even to the undiscerning viewer - but the unspoken but thinly disguised yaoi elements in it...
wat with all the blushings when two male characters held hands, the master-servant relationships, the sexual insinuations between samurai comrades, all the peach blossoms and sakura petals flying about when two male characters exchange words or looks... and the biggest giveaway of all: the effiminated, androgynous-looking and behaving male characters.
Quite frankly, i dun see wat bigger roles the female characters (i.e. Saya and the female spies) have other than as an effort of the producers to incorporate some 'healthy', feminine attraction in the anime in a bid to convince the rest of the viewers that this show is not blatantly gay. Taking them away to be replaced by more androgynous male characters certainly wun alter the story plot much.
I wonder how the male fans of this anime wud think of all these?
Obviously this anime attracts the male becos of all the fighting, the violence, the characters comraderie, the real-life history background on which the story is based (during Japan's Meiji era), the intriguing spies-ninjas-samurais plot and code of honour bullshit. Oh, and the beautiful art/animation and soundtrack too.
While some girls will also be attracted by these genre of animation, i think the majority also become enthralled becos of the yaoi elements in it.
Though most gals will deny this when asked face to face, till they're blue in the face and out of breath, it remains that there's jus something beguiling about the boy-boy love affair.
Jus like how lesbian love (or rather, jus the sex act) attracts boys so much.
(Wats better than one naked female body? Two naked female bodies. Wats better than one naked male bod? Two naked male bods. Wats better than two naked male bods? Three naked male bods...)
And in the world of manga and animation, there is jus something inexorably appealing about the aesthetics of the bodies of two same-sex characters entwined together, accentuated by a usually mood-enhancing background or atmosphere created by the artist's expert hand.
Even for the straight person, i suspect it wud be the same.
Jus some voyeuristic insight into how the not-so-straight pple think, feel or behave.
(But then again, most such manga and anime scenarios are very aesthetically-enhanced and the plot romanticized. Or they may jus incorporate too much exaggeration or humour. And most of the artists who drew them may not even be crooked themselves and therefore, have drawn these stories out of their own romanticized and tweaked imaginations. Then again, its interesting to see things from their point of views also, so this may not be totally incongruent.)
This anime and its themes sure wud make a very interesting study for english literature, no?
+ Ursula r e m e m b e r s again + 3:33 AM
Sunday, October 02, 2005
Leave-taking
Frens have been asking me to quit my job already, becos quite frankly, i cant catch up with most of my studies and school work now.
So Monday wud be my last day at work.
Not because i'm listening to my frens or heeding my perpetual sleep-deprivation state of consciousness these days, but becos they have finally found a perm to replace my position. Finally. Happy for them. But while i'm glad i finally can get my rest after 3mths of continuous work (including nearly one month of schooling and working), wonder where am i going to get another part-time job that pays as well as this does... =/
And the sentimental fool in me is going to miss everybody at work....
+ Ursula r e m e m b e r s again + 6:08 PM
